My Extended NYC Vacation

To all my dear ones who read this blog,

You all have your reasons: some of you love me by family relation, some of us went to school together and some of you are curious about this Mennonite Opera Singer who lives in big cities and writes about the beauties and difficulties of trying to find balance (aka living) from my niche perspective. A perspective that nevertheless runs the gamut of human experience: budget and commercialism, glamor and simplicity, faith and freedom, trying new things and resting enough, food…

The past month has felt like an extended vacation in NYC. Although I have been teaching, July is a dry month for musicians in the city, and for me that has manifested in not having my church job, no upcoming gigs and fewer lessons because my students have varying summer schedules. This certainly poses significant financial implications, but it also has challenged me. Since the beginning of 2023, I have felt challenged to discover joy in life despite career challenges (they will always be there), to, instead of fretting when I don’t have singing work, relish the time and freedom that comes with such a lull. This month has been a culmination of this mental and emotional work. Today, as I write, I am exhausted and I am full. I have done and felt so many things this month! It has been full. Perhaps not entirely balanced, but most importantly, I feel like I am making the most of living in NYC, rather than feeling crushed by the expense and expectation.

I have heard from so many of you who see my social media posts cautiously mentioning that it seems like things are going well, and I am happy to report that my social media has been accurate! I have been doing LOTS of things and seeing lots of wonderful people and it has truly been soul-soothing and delightful, though exhaustuing as well!

Without further ado: Early July

Let no time in NYC be wasted! After last writing, I squeezed in two very different and very intense concerts in the city. One was an evening of experimental… experiences that a friend was playing in. I made my way out to the bar in Bushwick (Brooklyn) where this was happening, and I knew I was out of my breadth. Already when I take the subway in Brooklyn, I often feel out-of-place, too conventional. There are so many people living their truth, their self-expression outwardly and I am so happy that there is a place for people to do this, literal zones of no judgment in the city, beyond the city. However, my outward self-expression is more mainstream… I like pretty colors, pretty flowers. Not exactly alternative life-style markers. All of this to say, this part of the city held a high concentration of outward self-expression that could accurately prepare me for the experience I was about to have. This music was exactly what I expected from the Brooklyn scene, art being made to stretch the bounds of art, to be fully creative, not to pull an audience to make money, but to express in new ways. I love and support this philosophy fully! Was it my kind of thing? Absolutely not, but it took me out of my comfort zone and I left reconsidering ways to express, and creativity. Is this not what we want from art? And I love to enter my friends’ worlds so I can know them better, too.

The next evening, I went to hear Tori Amos play at the Beacon Theatre with my second cousin, Eric. After Eric invited me several days earlier, I listened to some of her music and was familiar with none of it. This concert was another world: an internationally successful artist who has produced accessible music for decades, and though I didn’t know the music, the production quality was extremely high, the musicianship phenomenal. I certainly enjoyed it, and seeing Eric get so excited with every song shift.

Then, I was on my way back to Central PA in anticipation of Grace having a baby. For the first time in my duty as sister-doula, I failed to bring the baby. Nevertheless, we had a great time. I took the kids thrift-shopping (okay fine, the kids came along with me as I went thrift-shopping) and then to play UNO while drinking bubble tea. We brought some back for almost-5x-Mommy.

My first July Fourth in NYC was delightfully urban… I laugh at myself as I reread that and hear how diminutive it sounds. But the truth is, I have never spent July Fourth in a city where I live. Most of my life I have been on the go for the holiday or in a city outside of the US (where July Fourth as a date is not enough reason to have a BBQ and blow things up). This year, I heard some interest from a few friends in having a July Fourth Picnic, so I organized one in the park nearest to my apartment. There was even space there for BBQing and one of my friend’s got a charcoal grill for the occasion. July 4th arrives and the forecast shows thunderstorms on and off- ALL day. Not great for a picnic in a park… I called off the park, but the weather showed signs of improving, so a small group congregated at my apartment with hopes of getting back out to the park. Well, we never made it to the park, but after an hour in my small room, Max (grill-man) decided to look up the city regulations for grilling. Then, despite the thick humidity and intense heat of the day, we found a spot on the sidewalk, 10 feet from the building, fired up the charcoal grill and had a veritable sidewalk BBQ in the concrete jungle. It was epic. We had watermelon, we had pears. We had hamburgers and hotdogs. We had buns, we had gluten-free buns. We had an amazing steak from Lancaster County (courtesy of Grace Delp’s fresh quarter of a cow!). We had watermelon. We had goat cheese. There was more, but need more be said? I even whipped out some s’mores ingredients (including some rice cakes for the gluten-intolerant). I was so proud. Did I mention that we had water guns? Sometimes you must be reminded of youth by the youths in your life- not that I have ever forgotten about water guns :-)

Mid-July

I spent a few days cat sitting for my friend Joan in New Jersey. Joan’s house has long been a haven for me, but I was also very glad for her to have the opportunity to get out and visit a friend upstate. After a few days alone in Jersey though, I was ready to get back to the city, to my social circles (ha!), but also to prepare for my dad’s trip to NYC later that week.

I have loved having family come to visit me in Brooklyn! It is a delightful excuse to see and do new things in my own neighborhood, to show them things I love and to wander and do some touristy things in Manhattan (and elsewhere) as well. Dad has come to NYC enough times now that I think we have largely moved beyond touristy things, so we did a tour of Greenpoint, tried a bunch of restaurants I’d looked at but of which I’d never ventured inside. Of course, we went to my favortie Japanese tea place, went to a Japanese market and got wagashi to enjoy with farewell tea (and delicious slices of mango that Aunt Karis sent up from Florida!). We got coffee and donuts and Greenpoint’s famous and classic coffee and donut shop, Peter Pan’s (to which I dared my dad to wear my hot pink slides and he did!) and we did venture to Manhattan, to the Greenmarket in Union Square where my friend Nathan was selling goat cheese. We got some Georgian food (checked it off my bucket list!) and walked further to the Hudson and enjoyed the views before venturing back to Brooklyn to get ready for the Mets game that night. Dad loves baseball and most sports. The Yankees weren’t in town, and since Joan loves the Mets, I decided to treat them both and got us nosebleed tickets to the Mets game. It was a terrible game- the Mets lost badly and only had one hit, but the company and energy was a lot of fun, AND it was fireworks night and they did put on a good show! We ate peanuts and sang along to the NSYNC karaoke, stretched in the 7th and did the wave (the most exciting part of the game, if you ask me!). All in all a very successful evening and the rain didn’t start pouring until we got off the subway to walk home to Brooklyn thereafter.

I dropped Dad off at the airport and drove upstate to catch the second half of my friend Max’s birthday weekend in Woodstock. It was a fun and crazy weekedn. I met lots fo new people and it was great to be out of the city in a bit of mountain and nature. I taught (and won) some Dutch Blitz and Anomia and fought over the proper preparation of potatoes.

Late July

I sang in a neat performance project at the Brooklyn Peace Center that inspired me about creating and including lots of people and different ideas in performance. I got my haircut by Addy, who works at my local laudromat, and got to hear some of her perspective about growing up in Greenpoint. I joined my friend Philip for a couple of church services and really enjoyed and connected with one of them. I had a lovely, fancy afternoon tea with Linda, Emerys and Annabelle in Midtown and went to a soundbath at the Brooklyn Botanical Gardens with my new friend Marisa. I cooked lots of wonderful NYTimes recipes (marinated shrimp and watermelon salad, coconut milk poached halibut, tamarind and cranberry swordfish, soy-marinated salmon handrolls, lemon zucchini eggs, Indonesian chicken salad… cooking is so restorative for me!). I signed up for a fitness class app trial and tried local boxing, pilates, yoga and barre classes. I discovered a matcha cafe with Matt and spent a day in Greenpoiunt with Gabe (where we found amazing matcha softserve at my favorite tea place, Kettl), back in town for a month with his family. I investigated NY Restaurant Week in Long Island City with Greg and Catherine. I sang solos at Marble church, visited the Met Museum with Eliza and saw the Van Gogh Cypresses exhibit. I saw Barbie at the drive-in movie theater in Greenpoint with Matt- the view was amazing! Gabe and I sat in line for Shakespeare in the Park tickets on the most beautiful summer morning in Central Park, playing cards and eating the salmon handrolls I packed for our picnic lunch. I went to get matcha and to the MoMA with my cousin, Emerys, then met Gabe, Eliza and Sam back in the Park to see an amazing production of Hamlet. I went to drop-in improv classes, 2 by myself and 1 with Greg and Catherine. The three of us went to the beach with my friend Sam, an activity I had never associated with NYC, but indeed, the ocean is right there! And last, but not least, I ventured to Six Flags Great Adventure with Gabe and Matt for a wild day of no lines and rollar coasters. And for those of you who are wondering, yes, all of this was quite exhausting to do in a month. But it was also really soul-filling and really helped me see all that I have at my disposal in the city. I don’t have to feel so limited by work or money. Obviously balance is important, but I think I had created a clautrophobic prison for myself that wasn’t getting out and experiencing things.

Did I mention I went speed-dating? Yes, I also did that. It was a very validating experience, though I did not meet my future husband there.

Now I am in Vermont for a few days on vacation and then for a week and a half as postseason staff at Marlboro. So grateful for the people here and to have some time up here in this cool and beautiful state.

Marie in NYC